Dianne Swanson, Extension Educator
University of Nebraska Cooperative Extension
A family council can build commitment, communication and quality time together, qualities that make families strong. A family council is a regularly scheduled meeting of family members within a household where cooperative family decisions are made that affect all family members. The meetings have set procedures, are led by a youth or adult chairperson and includes a recorder who will take notes on discussion and decisions. A family meeting is not a discussion over dinner or while driving. It is not called only when there is a problem.
A family council deals with issues that affect the family. These might include information about upcoming activities; discussion of problems affecting family members; decision making regarding family plans and family involvement for running the household.
Pick a consistent time & day, preferably weekly. Keep interruptions to a minimum during the meeting so the family can truly concentrate on the task at hand. Family councils can be used with children of any age. Young children learn their input makes a difference. Older children learn independence and caring. The chairperson position can rotate allowing children in the family the chance to build responsibility. Encourage participation of all family members in the meeting, but don’t make it mandatory. Be sure, however, that non-attending members realize decisions made will affect them even if they are not present. Recognizing achievements of the members is a great way to open each meeting. Use a standard format for discussion. Post this in easy view so that anyone can add topics throughout the week.
Develop procedure rules such as no interrupting and speak only when called on. It’s important to realize that problem solving isn’t always smooth in a family council. The goal is to find agreement by the end of the discussion, not at the outset!
This week, make plans to try a family meeting. Don’t give up after one; after you have tried a series of three to four, go to unlforfamilies.unl.edu, click on TIPS and let us know about your successes and challenges.
Source: The Key Is Communication - S. McGarvey and J. Clark, University of Missouri-Columbia; Setting Up a Family Council - H. Lingren, University of Nebraska Cooperative Extension; Raising Self-Reliant Children In A Self-Indulgent World - H.S. Glenn and J. Nelsen.
Written by Dianne Swanson, Extension Educator, University of Nebraska Cooperative Extension.
